Friday, January 20, 2012

What's Love Got To Do With It?

I wanted to write this post on "Love" since Valentine's Day is coming up and all, and I just couldn't resist this title for a post...bear with me!  I was thinking about this after I wrote about it in one of my daily journal entries.   Yes, in addition to keeping up this blog, I also journal daily.  It really helps to put things into perspective because blogging sometimes is filled with uploading pictures rather than actually digging deep into myself.

I was asking myself, "Self, do you really understand what love is?"  It can't possibly be just the stuff in songs and cards.

 I found these on Pinterest.  Cute, huh?
Love is that which makes you give when you don't want to give, when you're tired, and when you'd rather isolate.  For me, food was what I used to medicate myself during those times so I could keep on going.  I would sneak away to grab cookies, mini chocolates that I had stashed away in cupboards, bowls of ice cream, or forkfuls of cake leftover from birthdays or other celebrations.  I needed sugar to get me up from the computer or the couch or out of my room to attend to all those needy little people in our home.

But then I miraculously had a willingness to clean out my cupboards, shake off the fetters that had me in bondage, a slave to my cravings and food temptations.  Miraculously my eyes were opened to the truths around me.  Babies needed to be changed, fed, and held.  Older kids needed understanding, compassion, and direction.  Daddy needed attention, encouragement, and support.

Amber is the genius behind these cookie creations.  Find her
at Sweet Ambs.
And then there was me.  When I was infatuated with sugar and sugar cravings ruled my waking moments, I never went to bed without guilt, shame, or remorse.  I had all kinds of demons plaguing me in the mirror as I brushed my teeth before I went to bed.  Those demons tried to tear me down and wear at my soul.  My motherhood was in jeopardy.  I was doubting my vocation.  Did I love myself?  Did I love myself enough to stop letting sugar and food in general be my god?  I did some definite soul searching, praying, and asking God to give me the willingness to give up those things that weighed me down, literally and figuratively.  He did!  And now I love myself honestly and maturely.  There is no guilt.  There is no remorse.  There is just love....pure, simple, and unmedicated.  If I can do this, anyone can do this one. day. at. a. time.

Found these on Pinterest, too.  Wet on
wet Royal Icing and toothpicks...easy, peasy!



2 comments:

  1. Grace,

    This is such a beautiful and honest post. Thank you! I feel the same way about exercise as you do about food. When I don't look after myself and I'm too lazy to move, I go to bed feeling guilty. But having the self discipline to live a healthy lifestyle so I can keep up with my family, that makes me feel good about myself. And that makes me a better mother. Does that make sense? Probably rambling!!

    I like the saying that states that love is a verb, not a noun, an action, not a feeling.

    You journal daily? I do too! Every day, even when I have written a lot for my blog. My journal is just for me so I don't worry about composition but write without restriction. One day I hope I will enjoy going back to my old journals and reliving my journey through life.

    God bless you, Grace!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah for journaling! God Bless you, too, Sue. And thanks!

    ReplyDelete

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