10. You can wake up whenever you want.
9. Wal-Mart, Target, and the grocery store count as field trips.
8. Corporal punishment is permissible.
7. Home Economics starts in Kindergarten.
6. P.E. is running to get the mail.
5. It's fun to raise the heckles of retired teachers in the neighborhood.
4. You can flirt with the principal and not get sued.
3. Ketchup can be served as a veggie and jelly as a fruit and the USDA will not come after you.
2. You don't have to make friends at playdates with moms you wouldn't otherwise make friends with because...your kids don't have any friends.
1. Your kids get to learn all the things you didn't in public school.